The Appreciation Experiment

Hi there!

I hope everyone has had a relaxing and enjoyable holiday break. Today's post is the results of a little experiment my family and I tried on my brother, and I think that it is worth a try for everyone.

I call it "The Appreciation Experiment."

For everyone, feeling appreciated goes a long way. Sam Walton, founder of Wal-Mart, stated the following wise words on appreciation: "Appreciate everything your associates do. Nothing else can quite substitute for a few well-chosen, well-timed, sincere words of praise. They’re absolutely free and worth a fortune.”

And I agree. In all of my years, as a student, employee, team member, and everything else, I am yet to meet a person who feels over-encouraged, over-appreciated or over-praised. However, I have met many people who feel the opposite. They don't get the praise they deserve and overall it affects their happiness. This isn't because they are needy or desperate, it's because they're human.

So why is praise so important? You may know a few people who have the attitude, "I don't need it, I never got it, so why should I give it?" Well, for starters, a few well thought-out and sincere words make others feel valued and appreciated, and when people feel that they are valued, they become more engaged and positive.

Positive energy is contagious. I observed this little gem during the week that my family decided to make my brother feel loved and appreciated in an over-the-top fashion. But he didn't complain, and neither did we.

We set ground rules.

1. Overtime we saw him, we had to say that we loved him.

2. Even if he messed up, we had to tell him he had done a good job.

3. If he needed to do something, instead of yelling, we worded it as an encouragement.

And my oh my was the energy of the house different. So different, in fact, that we have not even concluded the experiment. We can't bring ourselves to. It is like my brother is a different person.

He doesn't nag. He doesn't scream, cry or throw tantrums. Things he would struggle with in the past have seen dramatic improvement.

Not only this, but the opportunities for applying this sort of experiment in your own household are limitless. You don't need an autistic sibling to try it, in fact, you don't even need a family. Simply shoot off an email to your colleague this afternoon telling them you love how they organised the filing cabinet. Tomorrow, comment something lovely on their Facebook post. On Monday, let them know that you hope they had a great weekend. You see how it works.

Watch for the difference in the attitude of the person you trial this on - if done correctly, you might see them walking around school with a smile on their face. They might try that little bit harder at the gym tonight. They might even start complimenting their friends, letting their friends know how valued they are, and spreading the message.

I really hope you do try to let people know how appreciated they are. Like I said before, I have never met a person who said they felt over-valued or over-appreciated. 49% of employees would change jobs if they would feel more appreciated at the other. 49%. So send that email, comment on that photo and ask someone about their weekend. It will probably be the nicest thing someone has done for them all day.

Love,

E.